Endou's Great Escape
by XxNeONxX
Summary: The Greek gods have accidentally evaporated our beloved captain on the day of their match with Teikoku and the whole world is in chaos. Bad summary. please read.


Disclaimer: I own Nothing.

* * *

KIDOU BATTLES THE CHEER-LEADING SQUAD.

* * *

Kidou started for school very late that morning and was in great dread of a scolding especially since commander Kageyama was keen on a pre-match practice session. They were going to face the Raimon Eleven today.

It was a warm day, the sun bright in the sky and birds chirped at the edge of the woods. As Kidou passed down the school hall he saw a crowd in front of the bulletin board.

_What could be the matter now?_ He thought to himself, without stopping. Then, as he hurried by as fast as he could go, the Head cheer leader who was there with her entire squad reading the bulletin called after him, "Don't go so fast, you'll get to your practice in plenty of time!"

Kidou thought she was making fun of him and tried to get around from them but was blocked by two girls in purple-and-white uniforms just waiting to ambush him. They had him trapped.

"Hey Kidou," One blonde girl said, flashing him a dazzling smile. He stepped back and said something intelligent like, "Uhh?"

The girl stepped closer and held out her pom-poms to him, "We're having try-outs! You should totally come!"

Kidou felt all the blood drain from his face as he glanced around at the bunch of girls surrounding him with their large puffy golden pom-poms glistening. Then, balling up his fists he punched the pom-pom girls out of his way in a very un-gentleman-ly manner and ran to the soccer field all out of breath.

Usually, before practice began, the field would be very quiet. His teammates would be in their places and commander Kageyama would be walking up and down the sides shouting instructions and calling them every insult known in the history of mankind if they slacked.

Today, however, there was a great bustle which he could hear out in the locker room as he frantically pulled on his team uniform over his plain white outdoors t-shirt.

About two dozen kids from school were out on the field with the rest of the soccer team and they seemed to be talking- or rather, shouting all at once.

"What's the matter?" Kidou asked their manager worried that if one of his teammates was sick -or dead, because they didn't have any substitutes he'd be in huge trouble.

Their manager was a queer girl from his class who said little, if ever, voluntarily. Words had to be pried out of her like stones out of the ground.

"The match has been postponed." She said quietly, peering over her book at him with curious eyes.

"Why?" Kidou asked, glancing around the crowd and mentally counting off his teammates just to be sure none of them had been run over by a truck or anything like that.

"Raimon Eleven lost their captain." the girl mumbled.

After he noted that everyone was safe- shouting, cursing, kicking balls around in frustration or just standing there looking confused- he distractedly turned back to the manager.

"What?" He asked.

"Endou has been evaporated by the Greek gods."

* * *

ENDOU ACCIDENTALLY GETS EVAPORATED.

* * *

It so happened, earlier that morning, Endou had been on his way to get to school. He was already dressed in his soccer uniform, his duffel bag slung on one shoulder he merrily -erm- _skipped_ down the road to Raimon Jr. High. He would occasionally shout _"Sakka Yarou Ze!"_ at the top of his voice and frightened many old ladies in his way.

He didn't notice two figures looming overhead of him in their white flowing tunics eying his every move.

"This must be the boy, Apollo" A voice said.

"Hush, Hermes." Apollo said, pulling out his bow.

"What are you doing? Artemis told us not to harm him!" Hermes whispered frantically.

"My sister would never know, we'll just knock him out and put him in the trunk of my Mercedes and fly away."

"Artemis would hunt me down and carve out my heart with a dull hair pin if she knew-" Hermes said though he didn't seem the least bit concerned. They were, after all, immortal gods.

Apollo had already loaded his arrow and with a _Zing_ it went flying towards the unaware brown haired mortal boy.

But as the arrow pierced through his heart, Endou barely winced. Suddenly, there was a flash of bright silver flash and he disappeared into the light. Both Hermes and Apollo blinked in the blinding silver light and when they again opened their eyes, the boy had all but evaporated.

In the silence that followed Apollo though, _"By my father's beard! What just happened?" _

* * *

KAZEMARU LOSES HIS COOL.

* * *

Kazemaru could not believe this was his life. He stood in front of the school gates, actually dressed in his soccer uniform and Haruna was telling him the match had been postponed. Did she not understand the pain he had gone through prepping his hair for today's game?

Behind her, the entire school was in an uproar. Teachers and students ran all over the place, books and papers flew everywhere and there was a whole lot of shouting and cursing. At first, he'd thought it was the end of the world. But then, as that seemed highly unlikely, he settled for the alternative that everyone was generally crazy and that this was no big deal.

As they began the petrifying journey towards the club house he asked Haruna what was wrong.

"Natsumi is going to tell everyone together." Haruna replied pulling him away so as to save him from getting trampled under a bunch of primary kids. The two of them nearly got killed seven times each before they finally reached the safety of the club house.

The Raimon Eleven stood in a sober circle around the table on which lay a thick glossy postcard. Everyone was silent except Aki who sobbed into her handkerchief as Hanada patted her back.

The sacred silence was broken only when Kabeyama announced he needed to go to the bathroom.

"What's up?" Kazemaru asked as he watched Kabeyama disappear into the changing rooms.

"It's about Endou" Natsumi spoke up finally, "we believe he has been kidnapped by the Greek gods Apollo and Hermes."

She held up the shiny postcard for everyone to see. Printed on it in curled golden letters were the words:

"WE ACCIDENTALLY EVAPORATED YOUR CAPTAIN. ER-OOPS?"

LOVE,

APOLLO AND HERMES.

"That's bloody ridiculous!" Kazemaru shouted all of a sudden. First, he ran out of shampoo and then his hair dryer broke down. Moreover, he missed his bus and had to walk to school with the wind blowing dirt into his awesome hair. And now, here he was ready for the game and Endou just had to go get evaporated by ancient gods and ruin all the effort he put in his hair.

"I'm not playing anymore!" he screamed as the rest of the team gaped at him. Then he slammed the door behind him as he stomped out all hot and frustrated.

"Well, someone's mad." Max commented impassively.

* * *

Kidou would like to inform you that he is not at all intimidated by girls with pom-poms.

Kazemaru would like to inform you that he does not blow-dry his hair. Hairdryers are bad for the environment and your hair.

Commander Kageyama would like to inform you that he considers petty cursing beneath him. He'd much rather run soccer players over with a large black truck.

Artemis would like to inform you that her brother, Apollo, is a douche bag and that Father always loved her best.

Apollo would like to inform you that Artemis is a stuck up snob and an irritating know it all and that Father loved HIM best because he was the one who got the Mercedes.

Hermes would like to inform you that he is not picking sides.

Neo would like to inform you that she does not own all these crazy characters and that she is going to stop typing now as her brother is pestering her because he wants to play Plants v/s Zombies.

Tough she would like you to leave reviews as they persuade her to write better and update faster.

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Coming Up Next Time: APHRODI ACCIDENTLY LOSES HIS PANTS.


End file.
